Where?

Doing a ‘job’ I hated, working a contract I loathed: justified by “the money”.

When I turned 60, after spending 4 months in severe pain from my Fibromyalgia, I promised myself, “I’m not going to do work I don’t want to do. And, I’m not going to work with people I don’t want to work with!”

At the time I was working a lucrative contract as a Change Implementation Consultant. The money was great. The work was easy. But …

I wasn’t happy.

The work had become repetitive, repetitive, repetitive. And, what was worse is we were discovering that our boss’s new boss was a slimy, manipulative SOB. Long on promises; short on delivery; amazingly adept at ’slipping a knife in your back’.

Then 1 day, as I left a clinic, that little voice inside said, “Ya gotta quit this Lyle. It’s destroying your soul.”

This time I listened … 8 months previously when the same little voice told me to quit, I kept going. 1 and 1/2  months after that my Fibro kicked in: with a vengance!

So, I planned my “Exit Strategy”: subtly turning down contract assignments so I could ensure I had all my contract work complete, INVOICED, and PAID by March 31st (end of the government’s fiscal year). And, my clear intention was to simply not renew my contract when it came up for renewal April 1st.The idea was to leave quietly.

Didn’t work out that way; and the story of the ending is a fun one to be told some other time, so I can get back to the point of this post.

Lately in my coaching I’ve had several clients who are quite literally suffering illnesses, clearly connected to doing ’soul-sucking’ work and who are staying cause “the money’s easy.”

What’s been coming to my mind as I’ve thought about thier dilemmas is a visual from a Miami Vice episode: we see a man sling a bag of drugs into his Porshe; then we seem him driving the rain slicked streets of Miami to a ‘meet’, and in the background we hear the plaintive words of Glen Frey’s “Smuggler’s Blues”, “… the lure of easy money”, as the guy gets a bullet (or six) in the head.

Ya see the problem with ‘easy money’ is … well, that’s it’s alledgedly easy. There is no apparent cost. I say apparent because there IS a cost — hoo boy is there a cost!

The problem is that the cost of doing easy-money work often arrives later: in the form of physical, mental, &/or emotional problems.

Again, I know. I sometimes feel like I’m the “Poster Boy” for stupid moves.

It’s taken being gifted with not 1 but TWO chronic illnesses for me to wake up and smell the mocha cappachino. And, to really grok this 1 simple fact:

Doing work that isn’t your ‘God-given Work’ is going to kill you … sooner or later!

It’s short term gain for long term pain. It’s ‘pay me now, or pay me later.’

It’s your choice: take the easy money and wither your soul, sicken your spirit, and die. Or, take the ‘narrow road’, nurture your soul, foster your courage, sieze the day, and follow your Bliss!

FIND Full-Time or Part-Time WORK THAT DOESN’T SUCK – Step 2

First a brief review of Step 1.

Step 1 of my 3-step process essentially requires you to obtain crystal clarity about WHAT you want TO DO for a living. That is, how you want to contribute, what you want to give to the world, and what legacy you want to leave behind.

Now the idea of a legacy might seem a little “heavy” when it comes to thinking about a part-time job. But having a detailed description of your DREAM does ensure that any interim job or contract position you obtain will support your dream; not prevent it.

The detail you look for includes a clear picture of WHAT, WHO, WHERE, WHEN, WHICH, and HOW. (I’ll cover these details in my upcoming FR^EE teleclass)

Step 2: Use Your Theme(s) to Find THE Work of Your Dreams

Clarity takes time … and effort. The good news is that having any degree of clarity about your Destiny Dream^TM is valuable. Especially IF you act on that clarity and move toward your Dream – as it reveals itself to you.

So, how do you take all those apparently jumbled pieces of data about Who, What, and so on and create a Theme or Themes for your Dream?

Let’s use my Destiny Dream^TM as an example.

I’ve been crafting and using a Destiny Plan^TM to guide my life, career, and work since the early 90s. My Destiny Plan^TM has evolved to have 9 key Action Goal^TM Areas – My Health & Wellness, My Relationships, My Work, My Learning & Development, My Passions, My Sexuality, My Muse, My Spirituality, and My Societal Contribution. Naturally, your 9 Action Goal^TM Areas would likely be different from mine.

What I’ve noticed for the last several years is that, as I’ve done my Action Goal^TM Planning every January, I’ve felt this strong sense that I was missing something.

So, I began asking myself, “What do I need?” (By the way this is a critical question for an Enneagram Two – which I am – to ask themselves). Beyond the needs in my Top Three^TM Action Goal^TM Areas I kept hearing, Travel!

I’ve had a burning Passion for Travel since I was a wee lad. But, like many others, I choose to have a family early on and invested time and energy in my kids instead in trips to Europe.

Sure, whenever we could afford it we travelled: 1^st with the ex and the kids, most often camping trips throughout Alberta and British Columbia, an anniversary trip (alone with the ex) to Hawaii; work trips to New Jersey, Toronto, New Orleans, and San Jose; and following the divorce, many trips to LA/The OC, Monterey, and Palm Springs, while completing my Masters degree; and later with my current wife, trips to Nova Scotia (her home), New Brunswick, Alaska, Newfoundland, and countless camping adventures.

Yet, still it never felt like enough to slake my Travel Lust.

Then a few weeks ago during an early morning walk I saw a sign (literally), as if from God, “Wanted Part-time Cruise Consultants!” WOW!

I jumped at the chance to apply. And, the position seemed ideal: I’d be on contract not – god forbid – an employee; income was commission only – so I could make as much, or a little as I wanted; and I liked the ‘feel’ of the place.

NEXT ISSUE: Step 3: Landing the “JOB”

I love to hear from you. So, let me know what you think. Send me an e-mail or add your comment here at the blog!

You’ve seen the image in so many movies … the heroine/hero desperately running toward safety is confronted by a rickety, wooden suspension creaking, swaying, seemling ready to collapse. And, crossing that bridge is the only way to freedom, safety, and the treasure.

I think that’s not a bad metaphor for the transition to the life of our dreams.

Here we are on this side of the chasm: dogged by stress … a stale, boring, job … or yearning to express our gifts. Between us and our new, shining, treasured ideal life is the chasm of transition.

And, moving through a transition is very much like making our way across that rickety, wooden bridge. The crossing sure as hell doesn’t feel safe. We gingerly step onto the bridge, much like we tentatively tip toe toward our new life. We hesitate. We want to turn back. But, we can’t. Because behind us only lurks our old life which no longer sustains us.

And, as we step further along the transitional path to our new life it feels even riskier. Often, in the movies, the bridge starts to sway as it is buffeted by winds. The same is true as we move through our transition: outside forces unexpectedly slam up against us. Will they blow us into the depths of depression? Or, will we gamely hang on.

Sometimes, in the movies, a wooden bridge plank will fall into the stygian depths. Similarly, as we transition to our new life old parts of us will fall away, lost forever. And, that’s a good thing. But, also very scary.

And, once we’ve made our way onto the bridge of transition we can not go back. Moving forward is the only option.

And, the good news is that even if we fall into the depths of depression, we can make our way out. For unlike a fall from that wooden suspension bridge, the fall into depression can expose us to hidden truths that will make us stronger — if we do some Inner work AND climb out!

Actually, though, as I revealed in my special Unsticking^TM Teleclinic last week, my life has been on a Transitional path since March 1985. That’s when I hit the wall big time and decided to reinvent my life. I simply had no idea that finding and LIVING my true Calling would take quite so long. And, be full of so many transitions.

When I turned 60 last September I made myself 2 promises: 1) I would no longer do work I didn’t want to do, and 2) I wouldn’t work with people that I didn’t want to.

Those 2 commitments have created interesting changes in my practice. The ‘good’ ones are the nifty, new clients I’ve met since then, the challenging new work that has come my way, and the increases in my income. What hasn’t been so neat are some of the emotions that have accompanied this Transition.

Let me explain, in the hopes you can relate.

We have this fantasy that change will be smooth and easy. OK, maybe that’s MY fantasy.

Seriously though, I’ve noticed that many of my creative, eclectic clients are by nature OPTIMISTIC about the future. Dreamers one and all we create plans that are based on nothing going wrong. Then when the car dies, the snow storm wipes out the power for 2 days, or we get sick, we find ourselves waaaaaaaaaaay behind!

Oh, and let’s not forget about the jim jams. That’s a fancy word for the emotional reactions that surface during a transition.

That’s what’s been happening to me of late. Sure, rationally I can blame my lack of productivity on the chaos caused when the engine in the SUV crapped out. Or, the interruptions and noise created by the renovations going on in the home office. And, the problems created when my we site move took 2 weeks instead of 3 days.

True, those things are aggravating, but that’s not really what’s really kept me STUCK!

Have you noticed this? The more you want your dreams and the closer you get to them, the MORE VULNERABLE you feel.

Sure been happening to me lately. I feel very tender, raw. So, if a client doesn’t immediately respond I start feeling paranoid, “Did I say something wrong?”

You see, transitions are times that take us back in some ways to our childhood self. Times when we didn’t have a lot of power or influence. Times when there were bogey men. Times when some of us were abused.

And, all those feelings get resurrected when the roller coaster of transition drops down the hill into depression.

So, what can we do when Transition time makes us feel vulnerable, scared, and overwhelmed?

Here are some things I’m doing:

1. Talking It Through

Even Introverts need to talk it over. Find a good friend, usually a woman cause most women can provide the emotional listening you need. My best friend Brenda and I talk for hours every week, particularly when either of us is struggling. And, believe that’s most every week cause both of us are working hard to grow up.

2. Write It Out

I’ve been stuck writing. Thank God I found and wonderful writing coach and healer who has been guiding me through some very powerful writing exercises. Thanks to Debora Seidman of www.WritingThePrayerOfYourLife.com I’ve started to write again. Now, all the uck is coming out – but so is the good stuff! Trust me. Writing is one of the most powerful things you can do to sort out and get through a transition.

3. Get Support!

I keep saying this because it’s true and because it works! When I’m struggling I pick up the phone and call my coach. He has me back on track in less than 30 minutes. Lately, I talk to him once a week. So, get the support you need – GET A COACH!

I’m happy to report that my website has been moved to a new host. That means you can tune in to THE Unsticking Coach for more on what I’m learning about change and transition.

If you like this poem, LINK to it, please.

What is my destiny
that calls me so?

What is the expression
that wants to write
from me?

I hear the echoes
of a distant voice
but
am uncertain
how to transform
that voice
to action,
to make it real.

If I knew
what wanted expression
it would be
an urging
to follow one’s bliss.

This sense that
somehow
there are lessons
I can share.

If only
I knew
how to articulate
those

— oh, and
get paid!

If you like this poem, LINK to it, please.

(C) 2007 Lyle T. Lachmuth, ALL Rights Reserved

There’s a clear, simple
way to think about Your Ideal Creative Career. Here are the Top 3 components of
your Ideal Creative Career:

Your Ideal Career = The Right Work + With The Right
People + With The Right Working Conditions

There are other
factors. And, when I do career coaching with you, you and I will examine them
in depth. Curious about these other factors? Watch this blog, I’ll be writing
about them. For now, I want to take a brief look at the Top 3.

#1 The Right Work

Nothing brings more
satisfaction and happiness than doing
the work you love. That’s why I’ve listed “The Right Work” as the number
one factor in your Ideal Creative Career. How can I help you identify The Right
Work? I primarily use 2 industry standard career instruments: the Myers-Briggs
Type Indicator® (MBTI®) and the Career Direction Inventory (CDI). Sometimes, I
will have clients complete the Career Values Scale. Additionally, I would have
you work through exercises to identify your Vision, Life Purpose, and Gift(s).

#2 The Right People

Doing the right work is
critical to your satisfaction and success. But, if you’re working with toxic
coworkers or clients work won’t work. So, when I work with clients we focus on
identifying the kind of people they want/need to be with.

Here’s an example. I
coached a colleague who is a communications and IT professional, writer, and
aspiring novelist. She needed to return to ‘real’ work and was looking for a
part-time job. I had her complete the CDI to identify her top 3 interest areas.
And, we did some careful work to specify the kind of people she wanted to work
with. These factors focused and shaped her work search and she found just the
job she wanted! She loves the work and the people in her work group – oh, and
hubby loves her having a steady pay cheque.

#3 The Right Working Conditions

You love your work. You
love your coworkers and clients. But, you hate the conditions at work. There
goes happiness out the door. I’ll give you an example. I have a brother-in-law
who loved being a mechanic in the Canadian Navy. But, he’s over 6 feet tall and
work sucked every time he was assigned to submarine duty. Small bunks, low
doors, and tight workspaces did a lot to make his tours of duty less than
satisfying.

Here’s some homework you can do, if you choose.
Spend some time thinking about the 3 factors I’ve outlined and what they are
for your Ideal Creative Career. Then share your Ideal Creative Career here at my
Blog.  

Today I want to share a few thoughts about ‘escaping’ or at least moving away from this place of craziness.

What can you do when you’re in The Batty Zone. 

Get Help

When I was doing the research for my Masters degree, I had my first experience of the power of Self Help groups. For more than a year, I participated in weekly support groups for divorcing parents who wanted to do all they could to ensure joint custody and shared parental care for their children.

I had long believed that ‘a problem shared is a problem reduced. And, these groups really helped me see that their is power in having support from a caring group.

So, one of the first things I did when I was feeling "Batty" was to call up my e-buddy Barry Morris. Barry and I support each other. I know I can call Barry almost any time and he will ‘talk me down from the ledge". And, I do the same for him.

Dave Schoof, writing in his Disquiet Blog, recommended that we have a handful of close pals, supporters that we can call anytime, in any emergency. Barry is one of those people for me and I know I am for him. This self-created, Self Help group, can help us escape The Batty Zone.

My brain is in hibernation mode today. So, I will post more ideas later.

One of the issues we were discussing was the transition of my website to Wordpress

I made a suggestion about next steps and Barry’s response was, "NO. That’ll just drive you further into The Batty Zone!"

That expression grabbed me as the perfect phrase to describe how I felt.

So, thanks BAZ!

Cue music similar to the intro to the old Twilight Zone TV series…

"You are about to embark on an adventure. Enter if you will into…

The Batty Zone!"

    The Nature of The Batty Zone:

• Emotions run rampant,
• Moods fluctuate,
• Life feels chaotic,
• Thoughts swirl, and
• You feel completely out of control.

Sound familiar?

Once there how do you escape?

Stay tuned for "Escape from The Batty Zone!"

CREATIVE CAREERS
UNLEASHED!

The online Career/Life/Work
Newsletter

For Writers and other Creative
Professionals

From Lyle T. Lachmuth

Professional Coach
& Writer

www.TheUnstickingCoach.com   

Want
to subscribe to the ezine. Just fill in your information in the boxes over on the left and Voila!

HOT LINKS

On
March 1^st I joined some of my fellow bloggers to engage in a little
thought experiment conceived and launched by Mr. BlogWild!
Andy Wibbels. Follow along as I experiment with The Power of Intention and
manifesting my Callings at my post series, "The Secret Movie 30 Day
Challenge."

=========================================

THE POWER OF CALLING

          As part of trying to understand my Neutral Zone experience,
I reread William Bridges, "Transitions:
Making Sense of Life’s Changes," particularly focusing on the chapter about
The Neutral Zone. I was struck by his comment that once you’ve entered "the Zone"
you can’t go back to where you were, even
if you want to. Why? Because just being in the Neutral Zone – even briefly
- forever changes who you are.

Last
week my former, fearless leader called me up to ask why I was quitting my
contract. I explained why. And, then he dangled a ‘carrot’.

Well,
I was tempted -. for about 30 minutes. Then I made a career limiting phone call
back to him. I explained that I "didn’t’
trust his offer because I felt like he was just trying to sell me.’ He didn’t
seem to like that feedback. Well no biggie, because in the course of pondering
his carrot I really did realize I didn’t want to go back.

But,
where did I want to go?

Have
you ever ‘forgotten’ your Calling? Or, denied it? Or, ignored it? Or, pushed it
away?

I
sure have. But, during my sojourn in the Neutral Zone IT has been making itself
heard. And, I finally listened, resulting in the decision to have fun with my
pseudo-scientific exploration of The Power of Intention, "The Secret Movie 30 Day
Challenge."

Today,
I want to share some of the lessons I’ve learned about The Power of Calling.

What Is a Calling? 

I
am most familiar with the notion of Calling as described by my Christian Fundamentalist
doctrine. For me, growing up, The Calling was about being summoned by God to
serve "Him" as an evangelizer.

But,
as Gregg Levoy notes in his seminal work, "Callings:
Finding and Following an Authentic Life", many traditions have "calls".
Usually these precede prayer, initiations, spiritual healings, or major life
events and serve to summon adherents to, as Levoy notes, "a new level of awareness, into a sacred frame of mind, into communion
with that which is bigger than themselves… Primarily this force announces the
need for change; the response for it calls is an awakening of some kind." 

How Do Callings Show Up? 

I’ve
always experienced Callings as a wee voice speaking to me, combined with a ‘feeling’,
a ‘pressure’ like a hand on me, pulling me, prodding me, and guiding me.

So,
I was pleasantly surprised to discover other ways in which a Calling shows up.

One
is Passion. Levoy tells the story of Mark Dubois whose passion for the
Stanislaus River in
Northern California lead
him to found Friends of the River and then chain himself to a rock near the
river to prevent politicians from flooding the river past a level they had
promised wouldn’t be exceeded. Boy! That’s PASSION – and a hell of a Calling!

Through
the stories of others, Levoy shows how Callings can show up in Dreams. WHOA! I
said when I read that. I hadn’t thought of my dreams as a source of Calling,
yet have had very intense, TELLING dreams.

Finally,
Levoy explores how the Body can be a source of Callings. DOUBLE WHOA! I’ve known
for sometime that my body lets me know clearly and painfully when I am off
track. But, I had never really thought about its direct connection to Calling.
I’ve found Louise Hay’s little masterpiece, "Heal
Your Body" is a great place to look for the meaning of bodily symptoms. For
example, problems with our teeth are indicative of struggles with decision. And,
colds are signs of confusion. Sounds weird, but I know it’s been true for me!

How Can You Invoke Your Calling? 

A
word of caution first: DO NOT make any attempts to invoke your Calling unless
you are READY to go where it takes you!

I’m
learning that one big time!

I
put out an Intention to get clarity on what I’ve described as my Second
Calling. I’ve known for years that I’m Called to be a Teacher (read: Coach,
Trainer, Educator,

Mentor).
But, for the last 3 and a bit years I’ve had this ‘feeling’ that there’s something
more, or something else – my Second Calling.

Since
March 1^st I’ve been working my Intention through reading, prayer,
Inner Dialogue, and invoking Dreams. And, stuff has started to show up. But,
not the stuff I expected or at least not quite what I’ve expected.

You
see for awhile I’ve had this inkling that my Calling might be a call to be a
Healer. And, to work with victims of childhood abuse. But, so far, what’s shown
up is not quite that. For example, I have a client, a Clinical Social Worker,
who just yesterday invited me to co present with her at a provincial conference
of Social Workers. The topic: Promoting Your Social Work Practice. On the
surface that has nothing to do with helping wounded people.

But,
as my client pointed out, many professionals who are Called to be counsellors and
therapists have been wounded as children. Those wounds, and the work they’ve
done to overcome them, make them superb healers – and crappy self-promoters.
The act of trying to write copy, articles, and to do anything to EXPRESS
themselves OUT in the world evokes FEAR. They get STUCK big time.

And,
that’s where The Unsticking Coach comes into the picture. Why? Because I have
been there, done that, got the T-shirt, coffee mug, and scratches to show for
it. My Purpose is Life is to help people "professionals
rediscover and courageously express their unique gifts". That’s my Calling!
My Passion! Using My Gift of Words to teach others how to get unstuck.

So,
when you’re ready, pursue your passion(s), get out the crayons, invoke your
dreams, play inspirational music, and get ready to experience The Power of
Calling.

Let’s
sum up: I believe "God", "The Universe", "Your Higher Power", has Called each
of us. You CAN definitely ignore your Calling – but believe me it WILL HURT to
do so. Or, you can Invoke your Calling and experience The Power of Calling. The
choice is yours. 

Until
next time,

Lyle Lachmuth MS
(Organization Development)

The Unsticking Coach^(TM)

ABOUT THIS NEWSLETTER

PRIVACY POLICY:  I will not rent, trade, or
sell your name and contact information to anyone, at any time, for any reason!

CAVEAT:
CREATIVE CAREERS UNLEASHED and its publisher, are not engaged in providing
therapy. This newsletter is provided for informational purposes only.

CREATIVE CAREERS
UNLEASHED may be reproduced and distributed in its entirety only, including
copyright, legal, and contact information and only with live links intact.

Copyright 2007 Lyle T. Lachmuth, All Rights
Reserved 

When I had a big aha!

First, a bit of back story.

I’ve always had a high need for autonomy: way back in Grade 2 I told Ms. McLeod, who was pushing me to work harder, "you can have speed and accuracy. Not both!" Cheeky litte bugger wasn’t I!

Over the years I’ve come to learn that what I want from others is this: tell what OUTCOME you want. And, then let me figure out how to create it!

Bosses who tried to specify both PROCESS and OUTCOME drove me crazy!

In fact, I realize that really deep down I just want to know the outcome! I KNOW I can create the best process and execute it with precision. In fact, I rarely ever follow anyone else’s process. It’s "just tell me what you want. Get the hell out of the way. And, let me make it happen!"

Back to my coaching session with Kathy.

She was helping me get some perspective on my second calling. In the course of conversation she pointed out the potential conflict between my belief that "my calling is immutable", i.e. I can’t change it or dodge it. And, my other belief and behaviour that I could determine the path.

Later, after the call, it hit me!

Here I was "trying to do it my way!"

And, that ain’t possible with Callings.

In this case I MUST trust the process! Even scarier I don’t know the process.

An  important aha!

But, one I’m still learning to live with.

Thanks Kathy, for your "bloody rational thinking!"